Some people feel like life begins shortly after they graduate from high school. They go off to college, or they get married, or they chase their dreams. Some people wait until they’ve lived through their “wild years,” or until they’ve started their first serious job, or until they’ve fulfilled all their familial obligations. Others tried for some obscure indefinable “life” that they could never find and ended up in “just getting by” mode.
I fall somewhere in between the second and third scenario. But many of the excuses I’ve used and many of the legitimate reasons have fallen by the wayside in recent years and this probably sounds ridiculous, but at the age of 40, I’m a few miles past “just getting by” road on my journey and I’m really thinking about my future.
I jumped in my car a couple of nights ago and popped in a CD called “Words and Music: John Mellencamp’s Greatest Hits.” I listened to one particular song called “Your Life is Now” a number of times. I’ve loved that song since it came out on Mellencamp’s self-titled CD that came out in the late 90’s. Here are the lyrics that really spoke to me the other night:
See the moon roll across the stars
See the seasons turn like a heart
Your fathers days are lost to you
This is your time here to do what you will do
I can feel the moon rolling across the stars and the seasons turning in my life. My connection to the previous generation is secure, and I’ll make certain that they won’t be forgotten by the next generation in my family, but so many of the people in the generation that precedes me are gone now—and so are my subsequent responsibilities to them. I’ve also reached a point in which I’ve come to terms with my past and I’m quite certain that it’s time to leave my past behind.
Indeed, it’s my time to do what I want to do. For the first time in a long time, I feel invigorated, excited, and anxious (in a good way) about the future. My future.
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