A Ghost of Sorts

When my oldest niece was a young child, I began singing “White Christmas” to her every year around this time in my best Bing Crosby voice.

“You sound like a ghost,” she said to me one year.

I kept singing.

“Ghost,” she said.

And then I lost it. I laughed so hard I had to stop singing. If a ghost could sing, he or she probably would sound like Bing Crosby singing “White Christmas.”

For the next couple of Christmases, she would not let me get any further than the first bar of the song without yelling, “Ghost!”

After she entered adulthood, she stopped doing it. I’m guessing it stopped being cool. But I have tried every year since then, to no avail. What I wouldn’t give to hear her say “Ghost!” again. I think I’ll try again this Christmas.

The funny thing is, I’m sure she hasn’t ever heard a ghost sing, but even as a kid, she picked up on the hollow, haunting way in which Bing/I delivered the song. They don’t make music like that anymore. The song just feels like Christmas, doesn’t it?


Crosby recorded his version of “White Christmas” in the 1940s. Those three minutes and eight seconds are frozen in time and they allow us to step back into another era – one in which U.S. involvement in WWII would start and end, full-scale commercial television broadcasting was in its infancy, Jackie Robinson signed with the Brooklyn Dodgers and “A Streetcar Named Desire” by Tennessee Williams opened on Broadway for the first time.

All of this was before my time, but I can still imagine it. As I do, it helps me put the stories my parents and grandparents told me about that era into perspective. So I guess one of the reasons I sing “White Christmas” to my niece every Christmas is because it connects me, and her, to the past and I think that is important.

And I guess that makes me a ghost of sorts.

The Value of Road Trips

Road trips are usually more stressful than we remember. We have schedules to keep, people to get along with and differing agendas with the people we are visiting. But the road trips themselves are memorable for a reason.

They force us to converse with one another. They provide ample downtime to pray or process. And they give us a chance to listen to a book, album or sermon we’ve been wanting to hear, but just hadn’t had time.

During my most recent trip from New Mexico to Nebraska, I recorded my thoughts about my own road trips and how they have shaped me. As you listen (it’s about eight minutes long) to this audio post, I hope it will spark your own road trips memories from days gone by and that maybe you’ll even share a story about one of them in the comments. I would like that.

If you cannot get the audio player below to work, you can listen by clicking this link.

My First 50 Miles

If you haven’t listened to worship music
outside, then you haven’t experienced
its full power

I’ll hit the halfway mark of my 100-mile walking goal this week. I set the goal on August 7 with the intention of hitting it by the end of the year. As I have walked, a number of truths have solidified themselves in my mind.

The power of an extra tenth. I have an app on my phone called Endomondo (that Arthur Fonzarelli must have designed: correctamundo?) that tracks my walking using GPS. I hit the start button the second my feet hit the ground and hit the stop button when I arrive back at my van. The four laps I walk, plus the five tenths of a mile to and from the track usually total 1.10 miles. That extra tenth adds up. Every ten times I walk, I gain an extra mile. There’s a life lesson in there somewhere.

The power of music. My taste in music has varied over the years. That has led to an eclectic collection of songs on my iPod and it comes in handy when I’m walking. If you haven’t listened to worship music outside, then you haven’t experienced its full power. If you haven’t listened to Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger” during a workout, then you’ve probably never fully experienced an adrenaline rush. And if you haven’t listened to Metallica’s six-minute minute version of “Turn the Page” while traveling by vehicle or foot, then you are missing the power of shared experience. There is a time to listen to music passively, but when you listen to it in motion, it becomes a soundtrack for your life.

The power of encouragement. Many people have sent me encouraging messages since I set this goal. Most of those people are more confident than I am that I’ll reach my goal, but that type of encouragement fuels the fire. I was sick last week and just didn’t feel like walking, so I’m behind schedule now. And next week I’ll be on the road, so I’m not sure how much walking will happen then. But I have this week, and I can hear people cheering me on.

The power of community. The neighborhood I live in is racially diverse, which means the park I walk in is too. I’m enjoying seeing so many people with different skin colors interacting. Once in a while a group will bring a grill and cook out next to the basketball court. They also bring coolers of pop, condiments, and chips and they make an event out of it. And they invite others to join them. There’s nothing like food to bring people together.

Amazing Grace, Rod Stewart and Bubbly

Usually Latte will pose with the bottle of wine, but this
time she was more interested in the wine than posing

On my quest to find good red wine (and by good I mean somewhere between Kool-Aid sweet and Merlot), I picked up a bottle called Bella Bolle’, Sweet Red.

Bella Bolle’ is an Italian bubbly. I didn’t know it was a bubbly when I bought it, but maybe the design on the bottle should have given it away. Unfortunately, I’m just not that astute.

It looks like Bella Bolle’ only makes Sweet Red and Moscato d’Asti.

Less is more sometimes.

On Sunday night, I poured a glass of the Sweet Red and sat down to watch the movie “Due Date.” Synopsis from IMDB: “High-strung father-to-be Peter Highman is forced to hitch a ride with aspiring actor Ethan Tremblay on a road trip in order to make it to his child’s birth on time.”

I took a sip of wine as the movie started and was reminded of Wild Cherry Pepsi, which makes sense since it is a bubbly and has a combination of ripe cherries and raspberries flavoring. It’s not over-bubbly though, like a champagne. Instead it’s more like a hybrid.

Toward the end of Due Date, Peter and Ethan pull up to the Grand Canyon where Ethan wants to spread his father’s ashes. These two men could not be more different. Peter is a by-the-book kind of guy who doesn’t stray to the fringes of life. Ethan lives in the fringes.

Peter can’t stand Ethan and the way he lives, but he has softened toward Ethan by this point of the movie. Ethan is a loner who is looking for solace after his father died, and while he knows Peter isn’t fond of him, he is hoping Peter will just listen to him to help him get past a difficult time in his life.

They get out of their vehicle at the Grand Canyon and Ethan approaches the edge. “Amazing Grace” plays softly in the background while Ethan eulogizes his father (you can watch the scene here).

Wait a minute – is that Rod Stewart singing “Amazing Grace”? Wow, that is unexpected, but it works.

Ethan tosses his father’s ashes into the canyon as the song winds to a close. And it hits me – this scene is like the wine I’m drinking. I found beauty in the unexpected in both cases.

If you are looking for a unique sweet red wine that isn’t over the top sweet, Bella Bolle’ is a nice choice. And If you are looking for a dramedy that is so silly it is serious, Due Date is a nice choice.

Nougar, Manscape and Photobomb

Photo: Stickpen

I’ve been out of touch with young people’s culture for a long time. That was never more apparent than when my 15-year-old niece asked me to buy her some air heads and bug juice in 2005. Yes, I blogged about that.

This past week, I learned three new terms – all of which have more to do with my own generation. I’ll try to keep up as long as I’m able. But at some point, I’m guessing I’ll throw my hands up in the air, and wave them around like I just don’t care. [How’s that for dropping a little 1979 culture on you: “Rapper’s Delight“]

Here are the new terms:

Nougar. According to this blog post, here’s the definition: “Typically in her early to mid-30s – about ten years younger than your average cougar – the nougar (which stands for new cougar), refuses to grow up, ‘take dating too seriously and thinks that because she’s still living like a 20-something she might as well go out with one, too.’”

I’ve never been fond of the term “cougar.” Can’t say I’m particularly fond of “nougar” either. Movies are made (“Failure to Launch“) and songs are sung (“Forever and Always“ by Taylor Swift) about men who are “scared little boys” and refuse to grow up, but I don’t think we’ve hung a demeaning label on them yet.

Maybe we should all just grow up, huh?

Manscape. Somehow, the definition of this word has already made it into the Oxford Dictionary: “The removal or trimming of hair on a man’s body for cosmetic purposes.”

I first heard about this when Kelly Ripa and Michael Strahan were talking about it earlier this week on TV. Apparently he shaves his chest hair. I’m not going to judge.

I will say this though, I inherited my dad’s inability to grow chest hair. He used to say he had three hairs on his chest and he made sure to keep one hand over them while in the shower to protect them from falling out.

So, other than an occasional ear or nose hair that goes rogue, Warren men do not need to manscape.

Photobomb. The Urban Dictionary defines it this way, “To drop in a photo unexpectedly ... to hop in a picture right before it is taken.”

Here is a website with a bunch of examples. The photo in this post is another. Somebody intended to take a photo of some sort of weird looking green fish and the orange fish got in on the act as well.

If you have 20 minutes to waste spare, then Google “photobombing.” You’ll laugh at most of the pictures and be creeped out by others.

Touching Wounds

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. —Henri Nouwen

Jillian Jensen’s audition on the season premier of the X Factor USA on Wednesday was memorable for so many reasons. She was bullied in middle school and she carried the pain with her as she walked on stage. If you have twelve minutes, here is what happened:



Jensen chose the song “Who You Are” by Jessie J. The lyrics, and the way she delivered them, are haunting when you know her story (more on that in a minute):

I stare at my reflection in the mirror:
“Why am I doing this to myself?”
Losing my mind on a tiny error,
I nearly left the real me on the shelf.
No, no, no, no, no...

Don’t lose who you are in the blur of the stars!
Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It’s okay not to be okay.
Sometimes it’s hard to follow your heart.
Tears don’t mean you’re losing, everybody’s bruising,
Just be true to who you are!

I did a little digging to find out the story behind the bullying Jillian endured. I found a website she started called Overcoming Bullying on which she shares her story about her first day in middle school when a classmate tried to sell her drugs and she turned him in. She was no longer known as Jillian. Instead they called her snitch.

She says other rumors, which were not true, spread throughout the school. She began crying herself to sleep every night while attempting to hide her torment from her parents. She was embarrassed and didn’t know what to do. “How I wish that I would’ve had someone like myself to talk to about everything that KNEW exactly how I felt,” she says on her website.

The bullying led to her “hurting herself.” Cutting, probably. Words and music were her only true refuge. But as you watched her X Factor audition, you got the feeling her refuge had not led to healing. It protected her, allowed her to survive and gave her a safe place to create. But she still needed someone to touch her wounds with a warm and tender hand.

The audience did that when they made the heart symbol with their hands and swayed back and forth to her song. Demi Lovato did that when she left her judge’s chair and embraced Jillian onstage. The other judges did that by the compassion they showed her.

And the power of the human touch began its healing work.

“I feel like I can just push away those ... those ... those terrible things and really just go on and do what I want to do, and really be happy and not think about it anymore,” Jillian said after the audition.

Maybe if we stopped trying to offer so much advice, solutions and cures, and instead touched more wounds, as Nouwen suggests, we could see real healing

Dance in the Moment

Sometimes you just have to pull away from
everything so you can dance in the moment.
Photo: Aunt Owwee

I flipped through the radio dial on a road trip a few years ago and stopped when I heard “Hotel California,” by the Eagles. I’m not a huge Eagles fan, but one particular line from this song has always intrigued me. I listened for it that day.

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes bends / She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys she calls friends / How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat / Some dance to remember, some dance to forget

Some dance to remember, some dance to forget.

That line brings back memories of high school dances gone by. In those days, I danced to forget that I was an overweight shy teenager who had little confidence that I could ever attract a member of the opposite sex. Even when I did, I always had the feeling I wouldn’t be able to keep her. But there I was, dancing to a Billy Squier tune in a Catholic high school gymnasium with my girlfriend.

When we get older, we dance (both physically and figuratively) to remember those high school dances, or some other period in our lives when things seemed simpler – better somehow.

We take photos to remember. We listen to music to remember. We journal and write and blog to remember. We read to remember. We celebrate to remember. We drink to remember. We gather with friends at backyard barbeques to remember. We upload photos to Facebook to remember.

Of course, there are times in which we also do those things to forget. I certainly do both, depending on the mood I’m in.

But we shouldn’t forget to dance in the moment.

In the movie Elizabethtown, Claire sends Drew on a 42 hour and 11 minute road trip by himself to deal with his self doubt. She provides him with a scrapbook that includes a map, some photos, and a set of pre-recorded CDs with songs about her and instructions about where to go and what to see. As Drew escapes the pressures he is facing, he begins to relax, and that allows him to get beyond himself and his concerns. 

He talks to a man who has owned a sundry store in Memphis for 38 years. He stops for a bowl of the world’s best chili. He visits national landmarks. He gazes at the stars. And when he is tempted to get drawn back into the cycle of dancing to remember or dancing to forget, Clare makes this statement on one of the CDs, “Sadness is easier because its surrender. I say make time to dance alone with one hand waving free.”

Drew pulls off the road, finds an empty path among some trees and he heeds her advice. He dances alone with one hand waving free. And for those brief moments, he finally seems to understand what it means to dance in the moment – no trying to remember or forget, just a state of being.

There is power in that.

*****

For the record, I know that Mercedes Benz is spelled with a Z, but every lyrics website I visited spelled it the way you see above.

Oh, and if you missed the series of posts I did about Elizabethtown a few years ago, here are the links:

• Substitute People
• Elizabethtown, Part 1
• Elizabethtown, Part 2
• Elizabethtown, Part 3
• Elizabethtown, Part 4

100 Miles of Music: Mile 9.58

My blood sugar has dropped more than 200 points
since changing meds and re-starting a walking routine
Photo: Michael David Pedersen

So far, so good.

The combination of walking and prescription medicine is doing the trick. My blood sugar is dropping into a range my doctor will be happy about. Yesterday afternoon it was 128. I feel better physically and find myself looking forward to walking each evening.

I didn’t have a lot of time on Sunday evening, but I still took a short walk – just over a mile.

Here are the tunes that played randomly on my iPod:

Just for You by Lionel Richie. Love this song. It’s not one of his early hits, but it’s a good one nonetheless.

Let Me Go by Scott Stapp. A depressing tune that declares, “We are lost and all our hope is gone.” All of us feel lost sometimes, but we always have hope.

More Love More Power by Various Artists. I think this was originally a Michael W. Smith song that is a strong contrast to the previous song. This one leans on the source of all hope and asks for more of Him.

Nobody’s Fool by Cinderella. Always loved this song, but it is yet another breakup tune.

The Best of Times by Styx. A sappy love song. Have I mentioned that I like sappiness?

*****

I returned to the walking track on Monday night and a rather odd mix of songs popped up.

Spark by Over the Rhine. This particular line always pierces me, “You either lose your fear or spend your life with one foot in the grave. Is God the last romantic?” I wrote more about this song here.

Headed for a Heartbreak by Winger. Another breakup song. Wow.

Baggage Claim by Miranda Lambert. A sassy little pick me up. I like it.

Twisted Angel by LeAnn Rimes. A song about consequences. There are always consequences to bad decisions.

Damn by LeAnn Rimes. This song has always been a curious one for me. It’s about a woman who hates how well a man knows her. Maybe she hates feeling so vulnerable. To me, that’s what love is all about – secure vulnerability.

Cryin’ in My Sleep by Zurich. Some 25 years ago, I used to go see the band play live quite often. This song was always my favorite from the one album they released (to the best of my knowledge). I was stunned to see that they made a video for this song and that is available on YouTube.



I Don’t Wanna Waste Your Time by Over the Rhine. Wrote a post about this song a few years ago. I love this line, “I’ve got a different scar for every song, and blood left still to bleed. But I don’t wanna waste your time, with music you don’t need.” We all have different scars for every story we have to tell, and we’re all looking for someone who really wants to stick around and listen to us bleed. Bleeding leads to healing. But we don’t want to waste someone’s time with stories they don’t need.

Distance walked: 1.21 miles and 1.60 miles
Total distance since August 7: 9.58 miles
Goal = 100 miles by December 31

100 Miles of Music: Mile 6.77

The softball diamond has two first bases,
which probably helps to prevent injuries --
great idea!

A group of men my age, or older, swung for the imaginary fences on the softball diamond. The walking track surrounds the park, with the softball field tucked inside the track’s western boundary, which means the track itself is located about where a left field wall would be.

Everything in me wanted to grab a bat and give it a try.

But I also couldn’t help but wonder how many of these guys were going to wake up on Sunday morning with sore sides and back muscles, or worse.

I know about worse.

In 1997 I played on a softball team for my church. I normally played second base, but one day the coach wanted me to play first base. When the shortstop fielded a ground ball and came up firing in my direction, I could see that it was going to be over my head. I jumped to try to catch it, was unable to do so, and somewhere along the way I felt something snap inside my right leg.

I ruptured my Achilles tendon.

To make a long story short, after surgery I developed a blood clot which turned into a pulmonary embolism and that landed me in the hospital. After surviving that, I began the difficult road of physical rehabilitation. I worked hard and regained the use of my right leg, but it still isn’t right. It swells and my flexibility is limited.

That is frustrating for somebody who loves to play sports. I’ve haven’t played softball since that day in ‘97, but I would sure love to – especially when I see guys who are older than I am who are still playing.

As I walked around the park, these songs on my iPod seemed selected for just this occasion, even though they played randomly:

Jesus Name Above All Names by Various Artists. Nothing like hearing these words to bring perspective: “Lord, You are more beautiful than diamonds. And nothing I desire compares with you.”

Never Been to Spain by Elvis Presley. I used to listen to this as a boy on my record player. Always loved cranking up my “Elvis as Recorded Live at Madison Square Garden” LP.

Jump Then Fall by Taylor Swift. This isn’t even funny. Yes I jumped and yes I fell, but you don’t have to rub it in.

Forever & Always by Taylor Swift. My softball incident happened on a Tuesday. The opening lines of this song are, “Once upon a time, I believe it was a Tuesday ...” Hmm.

Whenever We Wanted by John Mellencamp. Hard to believe that this tune is 22 years old. This album, also titled “Whenever We Wanted” is one of Mellencamp’s most underrated.

What a Man’s Gotta Do by Living Proof. An original from a local band that played bluesy rock in the Melissa Etheridge vein. I bought their cassette at least twenty years ago and converted the songs to MP3 a few years back. Nice to see this one pop into the rotation.

Suddenly by LeAnn Rimes. I sang along with the chorus, “Suddenly you’re in this fight alone. Steppin’ out into the great unknown.” I sort of feel that way about walking and trying to get my blood sugar down – which by the way, seems to be working quite well. I’ve had numerous readings within the target range my doctor set since I started this routine.

Something to Believe In by Poison. Who doesn’t love a good power ballad from the ‘80s? Well, technically this is from 1990, but it’s close enough.

Distance walked: 1.60 miles
Total distance since August 7: 6.77 miles
Goal = 100 miles by December 31

100 Miles of Music: Mile 5.33

A picture of the trash / check stub/ check,
which has been doctored to remove the
account number

It looked like a piece of trash on my first lap.

It looked like a check stub on my second lap.

It looked like a check on my third lap.

I picked it up on my fourth lap and discovered it was a $200.00 check a woman named Kim wrote to a local vendor. The vendor cashed it and I’m guessing the bank returned the check to her. Apparently, after she disposed of it, either a dog got into her trash or someone stole it out of her trash can.

Should I put it in an envelope and mail it back to her with a brief note about where I found it or should I destroy it? If I send it back, she might be freaked out and accuse me of stealing it. If I destroy it, she might never know about the possible risk the check posed while lying in the park about a foot away from the walking track.

I decided to return the check to her. We’ll see what happens.

You never know what you are going to see when you walk. You also never know which songs are going to show up when you hit shuffle on your iPod while you are taking the walk.

Here’s the list of songs that showed up on mine Friday:

Never Grow Up by Taylor Swift. I like Taylor Swift. Don’t judge me.

When Am I Gonna Get Over You by LeAnn Rimes. I had no idea how many breakup songs I had on my iPod until I began this series.

I Don’t Want to Wait by Paula Cole. A song about seizing the moment. This one needs to stay in my rotation.

Fire and Rain by Badlands. Six years ago I wrote a paragraph about Badlands performing this old James Taylor cover live that I’ll repeat here. Read the entire post for the context:

The hair on the back of my neck stood on end as [Ray] Gillen sang the following lyrics with more passion than I’ve heard before or since from any performer, “Won’t look down upon me Jesus, You’ve got to help me make a stand. I just can’t make it through another day...” Standing in the middle of a bar, listening to a band most Christians have never heard of, I felt closer to God than I’d ever felt before.

Since I wrote that post, someone uploaded this video of Badlands performing this song in 1990. The sound isn’t great, but seeing it still made the hair on the back of my neck stand up:



Blessed be the Lord God Almighty by Various Artists. As I said in a previous post, you really need to be outside to fully experience a worship song.

Five Feet High and Rising by Johnny Cash. A beautiful song about God using adversity in our lives. You know that standard Johnny Cash guitar riff? It provides a perfect rhythm for walking. Give it a try. 

I Love You This Big by Scotty McCreery. Not my favorite song on his debut album, but it was his first single – the one that got him going. So, it’s fitting to be listening to it at the beginning of my 100 mile walking goal.

The Story of Us by Taylor Swift. I like Taylor Swift. Don’t judge me.

Distance walked: 1.44 miles
Total distance since August 7: 5.33 miles
Goal = 100 miles by December 31

100 Miles of Music: Mile 3.73

If you think kids are so involved in their gadgets that they aren’t willing to chase a ball around a park like we used to, then you might want to check out Churchich Park in Omaha.

Thursday night the temperature dropped enough to take a walk in the park and there were probably 20 to 30 kids playing soccer, 15 or so on the playground, a dozen playing tennis, 10 on the basketball court, five or six playing volleyball and several practicing softball.

These kids were much more prepared than we were when we used to spend all afternoon in the park as kids.

The soccer players had orange cones to mark the goals. When we played football in the park, we usually used a couple of shirts. The softball players had a dozen softballs, so they spent more time practicing than chasing errant softballs. And nearly every group had a cooler with water inside. We used to drink out of garden hoses at a nearby friend’s house.

As I made laps, I just had to be mindful of all the activity so I could avoid being drilled in the side of the head by a ball. But that’s a good problem to have. While I prefer walking in empty malls, I would much rather walk in a full park. 

I pushed play on my iPod, and here are the random songs that came out:

All Your Life by The Band Perry. Last year about this time I declared it as my new favorite song. It’s still right up there.

Won’t be Lonely Long by LeAnn Rimes. The anti-lonely song. That’s a relief compared to the songs that randomly came up during my last walk.

Jackson by Johnny and June Carter Cash. Have you ever visited songmeanings.net? It’s a fascinating website because passionate fans gather to debate the meaning of their favorite songs. One person said this about Jackson, “It’s about a married couple whose passions may have waned a bit (fire went out) and the man is forever talking of going to the bright lights of Jackson (TN? Famed at the time for its entertainment offerings and as the home of Casey Jones, then the subject of a popular song).”

It is Well by Rebecca St. James. A modernized version of the Horatio Spafford classic hymn. As I rounded a corner on the walking track and came out from under a few trees, St. James sang these words, “And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight, the clouds be rolled back as a scroll; The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, even so, it is well with my soul.” You need to be outside to fully appreciate these lyrics.

The Trouble with Girls by Scotty McCreery. Didn’t really have a lot of relevance to my walk, but a couple of thoughts did come to mind about 18-year-old McCreery singing, “Spent my whole life trying to figure out, just what them girls are all about.” First, this song is too old for him – I have CDs that are older than his “whole life.” Second, I’m not sure any man has figured out women.

Streets Cry Freedom by Badlands. One of my all-time favorite bands, whom I’ve written about in the past. I especially like these lines, “There is no reason, for livin’ in sin. I don’t believe when they say hey boy, you better give in. You know I’ll fight for what I know, till the day that I die. Cause I'm better off dead, then buried along with my pride.”

Little Things by Shannon Curfman. It’s not my favorite song by her, but the title is fitting for this blog.

Distance walked: 1.49 miles
Total distance since August 7: 3.73 miles
Goal = 100 miles by December 31

100 Miles of Music: Mile 2.23

A picture of the actual mall --
not a soul in sight.

A group of 10 women approached me in a desolate mall yesterday where I went to take a walk, which is probably not the worst thing that can happen to a single guy. At least I know I’m not invisible. 

I pulled out one of my earbuds.

“Is there another mall nearby?” said the ringleader.

“You mean one with people?”

She laughed. “Yeah, there’s nobody here.”

“They are tearing this one down soon. But if you go west on Dodge Street about three miles you’ll find a mall with lots of people.”

I picked this desolate mall on purpose. It has great AC, and since nobody is there, I do not need to dodge shoppers as I make laps. I chose the busier mall the day before and on several occasions had to take evasive action as several teenagers cut across the flow of traffic without even looking up from his or her cell phone or iPod.

After conversing with the ring leader, I turned my attention back to my iPod “walking” playlist, hit the shuffle button, and continued my four lap journey. The songs ended up being mostly about living without someone, which is probably not the most motivating music to listen to when you are mostly alone. But that’s the luck of the shuffle.

Breathe by Faith Hill. A sappy love song about being caught up in the moment. But I like sappy.

What Becomes of the Broken Hearted by Didi Benami. An old Jimmy Ruffin tune that has been remade more times that I can count. This line struck me as I was walking the empty corridors of the mall, “I walk in shadows, searching for light. Cold and alone, no comfort in sight.” Okay, maybe I’ll take this one off the playlist.

Tough Times Don’t Last by Bad English. So, we’ve gone from sappy to lonely to some sort of encouragement. That’s a good thing.

After Midnight by Matt Mason. A country tune that puts the words of mothers everywhere to flight when they warned that nothing good happens after midnight. Good thing it was only 6:00 pm when I took my walk.

Are You Gonna Kiss Me or Not by Thompson Square. More sappiness, which is probably why it is on my iPod.

With or Without You by U2. I usually only listen to this song if I want to brood a little. I wonder if everybody has one particular person who comes to mind when they listen to this song?

How Great Though Art by Elvis Presley. Marvelous song. Gives me goose bumps. And there’s nobody who can sing it like Elvis.

It’s My Life by Bon Jovi. “This ain’t a song for the broken hearted,” sings Bon Jovi. “No silent prayer for the faith-departed.” Finally, a little balance. 

Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy. And we’re back to the broken hearted theme: “Goodbye, my almost lover. Goodbye, my hopeless dream. I’m trying not to think about you. Can’t you just let me be?”

Definitely time to tweak the playlist before my next venture.

Distance walked: 1.20 miles
Total distance since August 7: 2.23 miles
Goal = 100 miles by December 31

100 Miles of Music: Mile 1.04

Photo: Thomas Beck

Over the past few weeks I've been working with my doctor to get my blood sugar down. He adjusted a few prescriptions and it is helping quite a bit. I've also been walking and that helps drive it down too.

I track the walks I take on a smartphone app called Endomondo (it's free). It uses the GPS in your smartphone to track the mileage, calories burned, etc. I just started a challenge for the casual walker on Endomondo. The challenge is to walk 100 miles by the end of the year. With 145 or so days left in 2012, that leaves quite a few "free" days. I would love for you to join the challenge.

It's 100 degrees out this afternoon, so I drove to a mall to do my walking and was met with the scent of perfume and cologne the second I entered. That made me think of the '80s. Not a day passed in which I didn't squirt a little Drakkar on before going anywhere.

As I started four laps around the mall, I took advantage of my iPod's shuffle feature and that led to one of the strangest mixtures of songs anybody has probably ever listened to. Thought it might be fun to list the songs periodically in a series called "100 Miles of Music."

The Good Life by Casey James. It's ironic to begin my walking challenge with a song title that is also the motto of the state I live in. And, I suspect, if I keep up with the challenge, I'll be walking toward the good life, metaphorically speaking.

Believe by Stryper. Hey, there's nothing wrong with a little Stryper. Yellow and black attack baby. You have to be at least 40 to even know what I'm talking about.

5150 by Van Halen. Van Hagar rules.

I Will Celebrate by Various Artists. Nothing like a good worship song to provide motivation.

Northern Sky by Nick Drake. This is from the Notting Hill soundtrack. It's the song that is playing as Jonathan sprawls out on the ice at the end of the movie. Sara hurls a glove from across the pond and it lands perfectly on Jonathan. No making fun of this scene or this movie. It's one of my all-time favorites.

Gonna Come Down by Zwarte'. Not one of their better songs.

Workin' On It by Casey James. A song about doing our part to make improvements, which makes it a perfect walking song.

Don't Let Me Down by No Doubt. Forgot I even owned this song.

The Nightingale by Trisha Yearwood. Don't think I have ever even listened to this one. Probably won't listen to it again any time soon.

It's Never Easy to Say Goodbye by Wynonna Judd. No it's not.

Distance walked: 1.04 miles
Total distance since August 7: 1.04 miles
Goal = 100 miles by December 31

Don't Miss Your Life

The older I get, the more I am drawn to country music. I love the stories and the messages. Phil Vassar's "Don't Miss Your Life" is a great example. The song is changing people. Here's what a few have said about it on Twitter recently:

@aFIOrini13: "Don't miss your life" by Phil Vassar really changed my whole perspective on life. The smallest things in life are the most valuable.

I love that sentiment. It's the reason I started this blog.

@WorleyFbabyy: Every time I hear "Don't miss your life" I think about how much I miss out on because I work so much. is the money worth it?

I feel for her. All of us need to work, but this song is prompting people to wonder how they can do a better job of balancing work with family. 

And then there are these heartbreaking words (read the hashtags):

@Jackie_Corco: Don't miss your life by phil vassar makes me cry hysterically...just chillin in the backseat sobbing.. #remindsmeofmydad #youmissedmylife

#youmissedmylife is the saddest thing I've read in quite a while. 

If you haven't seen the video, I advise that you watch it alone because you are probably going to cry:



But, as Vassar says in this video interview about the song, the beautiful thing about the message is, it is not too late. He says he hears from children who tell him they asked their dad to listen to the song and now he comes to all their games or cheerleading events.

Three Ear Worms, Plus One

A $3.00 adapter has allowed me to begin listening to my iPod in my vehicle again. Having that ability has led to three ear worms (a song that is stuck in your head), plus one. One of them is ridiculous, two are thought-provoking, and one … well, it just is.

The ridiculous comes from Jana Kramer’s self-titled debut album – which is quite good. There isn’t a bad song on it. But one particular song, called “Goodbye California,” contains this line, “I like your mustang, your sexy hot twang, country fried chicken is a beautiful thing.” She finds a way to rhyme “twang” with “thing” (pronounced “thang”) and I think that is what causes the worm. I could listen to her sing that line a hundred times in a row.

One of the thought-provoking ear worms comes from a Kim Taylor song called, “Days Like This.” In it she sings, “Days like this. Yeah you think about the ones that love you,” and later in the song, “Days like this. Yeah you think about the ones that went before you.” The editor in me wants to change the word “that” in both lines to “who,” but once I get past it, I identify with what Taylor is saying because I find myself doing both lately. I see my loved ones everywhere I look. [Here's the video for the song. If you are reading this via email, you'll need to click through to the blog to view the video.]



Another thought-provoking lyric comes from the new album by LA Guns, “Hollywood Forever.” The song “You Better Not Love Me” contains this line, “Girlfriend, take some advice. Opportunity, rarely strikes twice.” Does opportunity rarely strike twice? That does seem to be the case, doesn’t it? And if it does, what does that say about not hesitating when the opportunity does strike?

The final worm comes from the radio. I don’t own any music by Little Big Town, but they have a hit on the air right now called “Pontoon.” The chorus starts with these three little words, “On the pontoon” and they are completely stuck in my head. If you haven’t heard the song, YouTube it.

How about you? Do you have any ear worms?

Random Acts of Culture

A friend told me to go to YouTube and type in, "Random Acts of Culture." Here's what I found:

Misguided Notions and the Death of Dreams

Photo: Marcin Wichary

I enjoy watching TV shows like American Idol and The X Factor. Music is medicine for the soul and seeing an obscure artist get his or her big shot on shows like these is satisfying. It’s the perfect mixture of talent, hard work and opportunity – much like any other successful endeavor in life. But sometimes contestants lose perspective.

Tim Cifers is the perfect example. He’s a 30-year-old sales manager who loves to sing country music. He made it to the final 32 on The X Factor USA recently and before he performed for the chance to move to the final 16 (and a shot to perform live), he made these comments:

“I’m just your everyday country guy. I live the same life every day – just in and out – working at my job, but my dream is not to sell beer every day for a living. My dream is to perform in front of huge audiences and give my family the life they deserve. I don’t want to give music up. I don’t want to fail at having my dream come true.

“My family at home is just so supportive. You know, I want to make them proud too. So, this is a big step. If I got a no today, it would just mean going back home and going back to work and it would almost be like everything’s gone out the window. This is my one shot. I can’t quit my job because I’ve got to put food on that table and I’ve got to support my family. This decision determines the rest of my life.”



Cifers’ perspective is off in so many areas.

First, his dream to perform in front of huge audiences so he can give his family the life they deserve sounds noble. But true artists have something to say and when their talent and hard work meet opportunity, sometimes they get to share their message with huge crowds – not the other way around.

Second, he’s 30 years old. He doesn’t have to give up music. If he loves it, he can continue to pursue it while he’s earning a living selling beer to support his family.

Third, receiving a no – which did happen, by the way – is not failure. Failure in this case would be quitting an activity he loves.

Fourth, healthy families are not proud of one another based on success, but rather, they are proud of one another when they do the right thing. Cifers is providing for his family. That’s something to be proud of. The fact that he chased a dream on The X Factor is something to be cheered by his family, but receiving a no in the round of 32 shouldn’t, and presumably, won’t change how proud they are of him.

Fifth, going back home and going back to work isn’t a death sentence. Work is noble. And it’s almost as if he believes being a recording artist isn’t going to be “work,” or even monotonous at times.

Sixth, he can’t definitively say this is his one shot. It may indeed have been his biggest and best shot. But there’s another contestant in the competition who is 60. He understands what one (last) shot means.

As contestant after contestant on these shows say similar things, it makes me wonder what our kids are thinking as they watch. Are their parents correcting these misguided notions? I hope so. But I can’t help but wonder about the kids whose idea of success is being shaped by these contestants. Are they going to miss the fact that sometimes the death of a dream provides fertile ground for a new dream to be born?

The X Factor Series Premiere

Photo: Ethan Hickerson

Did you watch the premiere of X Factor USA on Wednesday night? It certainly had some moving moments. It had some bizarre ones too. I like the fact that nearly all ages can compete, and having live auditions in front of such a huge audience was a nice twist.

The only real negative for me was a lack of diverse musical styles. Nearly every contestant who got on the air was either into pop or R&B. Hopefully we’ll get to hear some rock and country mixed in as the auditions continue.

Here are a few thoughts about the contestants:

Rachel Crow: Loved her. Loved her personality. At 13, she brought down the house with her rendition of “Mercy.”

Terrell Carter: Dude can sing. I think he’ll go far in the competition.

John Lindahl: Plenty of personality. Great stage presence. Not sure he has the voice, but time will tell.

Siameze Floyd: If this were a celebrity impersonation competition, he would win. He’s Prince, minus the voice. He can dance and move, but that’s where it ends. Can’t believe they put him through.

Dan and Venita: He is 70. She is 83. They are married and make a beautiful couple. I loved the way Dan kept reaching out to touch Venita’s hand during “Unchained Melody.” Unfortunately, they just couldn’t sing.

You Only Live Once: My cat nearly jumped off my lap when one of the girls started doing her death metal scream. And the stunned look on Simon’s face was hysterical. “It was like you were singing,” he said to one of them, “and she swallowed poison,” he said to the death metal girl. I was hoping they would put them through just to see how they would follow that performance.

Linda Ostrofsky: A 61-year old screaming “I Touch Myself”? Come on. There is no way in the world this was a legitimate audition. This had to be a gag, a dare or a hoax.

Miranda Singleton: She said she wants to be the next Madonna. She sort of had Madonna’s look down, but the voice … not so much.

Simone Battle: She likes the word, “fierce,” which to her means confidence and exhibiting fearlessness. She had plenty of that, but she relied mostly on tight red shorts. My problem with her was her voice, which wasn’t all that hot in my opinion. She just seemed more concerned with her dream of “becoming a pop icon,” than with actually wanting a platform to say something of substance through her music. But she’s through to the next round. So, we’ll see. The one thing that resulted from her audition is – Simon and L.A. Reid aren’t afraid to disagree and they did so often.

Stacy Francis: A 42-year-old, single mother of two who says she doesn’t want to die with the music in her. Even before I heard her sing, I was rooting for her. She killed it during her audition, singing “Natural Woman,” bringing everybody to their feet, including the judges. I loved her “Wooooo” at the end.

Geo Godley: A 43-year-old “internet blogger,” as if there were another kind. I’m not even going to get into this guy’s audition. Let’s just say he disrobed. Another farce. There’s no way this was a legit audition. He’s just a guy looking for his 15 minutes, and he got it thanks to the show’s bad decision to air his audition.

Marcus Canty: A 20-year old guy who loves life and watching kids at his church. His mom told him he has two years to make a go of his singing career. He was at the end of his two years when he took the stage. I wasn’t as blown away with him as the judges were, but he can certainly sing. He’ll be fun to watch.

The Answer: Not my kind of music, but they are good.

Nici Collins: Can’t sing a lick and she made weird screeching noises. And again, I just can’t imagine this was legit.

T for Two: No. No. No.

Darren Michaels: Attempted to sing “Like a Virgin,” but didn’t come anywhere close to singing.

Chris Rene: Another contestant with a compelling story. He got into drugs and alcohol at an early age, has a two-year old son, hauls trash for a living and he has a dream. He sang an original hip-hop song called “Young Homie,” which was filled with hope. He says he’s been clean for 70 days and knowing his backstory made the song even better. Loved what Simon told him: “Maybe you need the show, maybe we need you.”

What do you think about the premiere?

Rebecca St. James and the Power of Encouragement

I’ve been a fan of Rebecca St. James’ music since the release of her “God” album in 1996. It’s still one of my favorite CDs. She’s also made quite an impact on my life spiritually. I wrote about that last year after having a chance to interview her for a newspaper article. She read that post and sent me an email telling me my story encouraged her.

As the body of Christ, we need each other, and St. James gets that.

Yesterday I had a chance to interview her again for another newspaper article – this one about her latest book, “What is He Thinking: What Guys Want Us to Know About Dating, Love, and Marriage,” set to be released next week. [I’ll provide a link on my website once the article has been published on the newspaper’s website.]

Throughout the interview we discussed points she makes in her book about femininity, modesty, and what Christian men want in a potential spouse. After the interview, she asked me, “Did you find the book encouraging, as a man?”

Do you see the give and take dynamic at work again? She wasn’t fishing for a compliment. Instead, she knows the power of two believers speaking encouragement into each others’ lives. And this morning, she re-tweeted what I tweeted about our interview yesterday. And the encouragement cycle continues.

The truth is, I’m nobody special. I haven’t sold millions of albums (or, in my case, books). But I get a chance to encourage people who do read my books and articles in various newspapers or magazines and I don’t take that for granted.

As I said in the post I wrote last year about St. James, shortly after reading something she wrote, I attended my first writer’s conference (in 1998) and that’s where the writing bug bit me.

Are you where I was in 1998 – somebody who has a sense of urgency to write, but you aren’t sure where to begin? If so, come and join me November 2-6 in Abiquiu, New Mexico for the CLASSeminars Christian Writers Conference.

If you are a little squeamish about jumping into an environment where professional writers, agents and editors for publications such as Focus on the Family, Tyndale and AMG Publishing will be present, Ron Benson and I will be teaching a workshop before the conference starts called “On Ramp” designed to help you get up to speed. We will go over writers conference etiquette, teach you how to approach an editor and you’ll have time to ask us questions, which hopefully will put your mind at ease as the conference begins.

I’ll be teaching a class called “Article Writing 101” in which we’ll talk about eight different types of articles, eight different types of leads, how to construct the body of an article and nine ways to end an article, in addition to discussing themes, subheadings and the importance of a good nut graph.

Finally, I’ll be teaching a hands-on blogging workshop as well as meeting with writers one-on-one to hear about your passions, to answer your questions and yes, offer a little encouragement.

Live from Daryl's House

Daryl Hall & John Oates
Photo: Gary Harris

Live from Daryl’s House, the free monthly web show in which singer Daryl Hall invites other performers to come to his house so they can jam together, is genius on so many levels. The sessions combine the best of multiple artists, often from multiple generations, and gives music lovers the passionate, believable performances they crave.

The current episode (#45) with Grace Potter is one of those – especially their rendition of “Low Road.” [If you are reading this post via email, you’ll need to click through to the blog to see the video since video doesn’t show up in email.]



The song opens with layers of guitars, every note having a purpose. And as Potter sings the first line, “I lost everything / I fell out of a daydream / At the door of a long lost friend,” she sings with her hands as much as her voice.

As she sings the second line, “And I cried aloud / Without an inch of pride / I knew I had reached the end,” the camera dips down low, capturing Potter, who is lost in the moment, and a photo of T-Bone Wolk, who played based with Hall and Oates. He died of a heart attack in 2010 at the age of 58. He appears in many of the previous episodes and it seems fitting to see him in this one because something magical is taking place – a blend of young and old, singing about loss and hope. And as they hit the chorus that contains wisdom from an “old and lonely man,” you can feel the hope.

But it’s a low low road
You’ve gotta roll down
Before you find your way, my friend
And it’s a high, high hill
You’ve gotta climb up
Before you get to the top again

In the next verse, Hall sings about making wrong choices and then he comes to the line, “But now I see so clearly,” and the way he sings the word “so,” will remind you of a dozen other Hall & Oates songs – in the most nostalgic of ways. Meanwhile, Potter dances and makes you feel like you are watching a performance from the early 70s. But somehow, the performance feels 2011ish at the same time.

Hall is 64 years old. Potter is 28. But the music erases those lines and you get lost in the moment. That’s the beauty of it.